How Does One Know That It Is Time for a Divorce?


There are a lot of weddings that are happening day by day. People get married for so many reasons and it is good if the marriage really works out for both of the partners. Relationships even marriage are not carved out in stone. Although at first, one might tend to think that the person you marry is going to be that someone who is going to be with you until you grow old, but there is still that big unknown and then you just see yourself in a situation where you are already wanting to just be free from such marriage. If after facing a difficult time you decided that you are finally going to end the marriage with your spouse, there is a family law attorney in Charlotte, NC who will be able to get your to that painful process smoothly.

You might be questioning your marriage or you might be facing a real problem. You might be even the one who is going to decide if it is already time for you to go or not. Marriage is truly full of unknown things which can either make or break the relationship. There may come a time wherein you say to yourself that you feel like getting a divorce, but how can you really be truly sure that you are indeed ready for a divorce and that the marriage is no longer fit for salvation? This is one of the painful parts in the process of considering getting a divorce because divorce does not only affect you but this also affects your children, your family, and your friends.

It might also be because the other one might have heard his or her spouse talking about divorce. This will then lead to questioning how it came up because one might think that marriage is doing well. The first instinct when this happens is that the spouse who does not want a divorce will try to make things work again or at least try to know what the problem might be.

There are a number of books and articles which talks about divorce that assumes that when a couple says that they want to have a divorce, it means that they are really ready to divorce their spouses. But, such is not really the case. Because when the divorce process actually begins, it is either one or both of the spouses are not really ready for it.

There are divorce professionals like therapists, mediators, and lawyers. They often believe that when couples start to utter words like “I have had it with him” or that “I no longer have feelings for her”, indicates the marriage is never really going to work anymore. Even attorneys often equate the fact that when their services are being hired to represent one spouse, indicates that they are indeed ready to divorce. But still, this is not really the case.

Most of the couples who commences a divorce are not prepares and they often are not on the same page when the divorce begins. This kind of lack of preparedness for a divorce which either causes the marriage to end abruptly or might lead to the deterioration of the divorce into competitive contests. Making a decision to obtain a divorce is one of the most crucial decisions that a person makes because of the possible consequences that can give a huge impact on him or her for years or even for a lifetime.

Thus, with this kind of decision, this really requires greater attention than what is usually given by both of the couples and professionals. This is a process in itself and once a couple is truly prepared and ready, they will soon be able to proceed with the divorce on the same page thus eliminating the emotional and financial ordeal which causes divorces to become antagonistic and brutal.

One primary reason why people just directly proceed with the divorce and not think about getting really ready for it is because they tend to think that the sooner they can get out of the situation that they are in, the better. Thus, there is now a natural tendency for such people who especially are in difficult marriage situations to proceed with the divorce as fast as possible so that they can start moving on with each of their lives. Some of the family and friends are often part of encouraging the divorce as well. This is because when they see that their loved one is hurting, they tend to prescribe of getting over with the divorce as soon as possible with the hope that once the divorce has been done, everything will then return to normal. But, sadly, in most cases that is not what is happening. Those couple who have made rushed decisions to abandon the marriage do not have the proper time to truly evaluate how they really feel and as to what other options they can have. This then ends up in a roller coaster of emotions, taking into account the intervention of the complicated legal system and also with a whole lot of life-changing decisions that they are going to make. As such, they end up making agreements in which they cannot sustain, so instead of making the situation better, this then sometimes turn out to be just another set of problems. This is why couples often end up getting tangled in very lengthy court cases and their very hope of an amicable and swift divorce ends up taking years in court.

Deciding to end up a marriage is not a mere premonition that you have to just decide with eyes closed. If you think that the marriage will no longer work because of the incompatibility of both of your non-negotiables, you still need to think deeply on the impact to your family especially if you have children. Never try to force that everything will just fall into place because it chances are, it might not. So as much as possible, identify first your issues and try to talk about it first before making a decision as big as divorce.


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